Good stories in Kenya: Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy
Teacher: Johnnie, why do you have a black eye?
Johnnie: I was punched by the fat guy.
Teacher: Tell me what happened!
Johnnie: I was standing at the bus stop and this fat guy came and stood beside me…
Teacher: Am all ears
Johnnie: I accidentally asked him for a good place to eat
Teacher: Go on…
Johnnie: He looked at me and said he doesn’t know. Then I looked at him from bottom to top and asked ‘really!’
…………………………………..
A couple returns from their honeymoon refusing to speak to each other.
The groom’s best friend takes him aside and asks what’s wrong.
“Well,” replies the man, “when we finished making love on the first night, I put a accidentally put Ksh. 1000 note on the pillow without thinking.”
“Oh, you shouldn’t worry about that too much,” says his friend. “I’m sure your wife will get over it soon enough.
She can’t expect you to have been abstaining all these years.”
“That’s not the problem, ” the groom says. “She gave me Ksh. 500 change!”
………………………………….
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field.
While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out!
He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.
Morals of the story:
(1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.
(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
(3) And when you’re in deep shit, it’s best to keep your mouth shut!
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